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During his school years, Thomas Edison was not the best student nor was he a teachers’ pet, but this had not stopped him from becoming one of the most renowned inventors in the world. Why? Because his parents believed in him. They supported his development and never doubted that young Thomas would be successful in life. By doing so, they nurtured one of the most important skills a person can master - self-confidence.

With Gratitude - Letter to Parents

"Dear Parents,

I would like to thank you for always believing in me. Whenever I faced difficult situations, your words of encouragement and support helped to turn my doubts into self-confidence. Thanks to you, I realized that I was able to solve small problems without difficulty. You also gave me courage to overcome bigger challenges. Often, I didn’t even consider failure as a possibility, because I believed in myself and in my capabilities to achieve my goals. It is true that I failed from time to time and you were the first to know it. However thanks to you, I understood very well that failures are a part of learning and they lead to improving the course of action in the future.

You knew how to rephrase unpleasant words that I sometimes heard from others, which helped me not to dwell on negative thoughts for too long. You have always been proud of my successes. I remember your joy, when after numerous attempts I had finally managed to tie may shoe laces. I remember your understanding and your empathy, when I got my first “D” at school. I remember how you believed in me, when I attended my first job interviews. You have never doubted my abilities, therefore I have never doubted that I would manage. You have always said that I will be able to solve any problems in life. You supported my interests and my development. Thanks to you, today I can say that I feel fulfilled. I wrote this letter to thank you and to tell you that you have been successful in bringing me up. I am happy.

Thank you. I love you.
Your child”

Self-Confidence

Self-confidence is one of the most important skills in life. You gain self-confidence in the process of dealing with various situations throughout your life. The level of your self-confidence depends on the way you handled these situations. When you are a child, many events and situations are confusing for you. You may face injustice (sometimes only in your eyes) or lack of understanding among your friends. You may fail many times and the failures may seem huge at that moment. When you grow up, you sometimes forget that these problems seemed very serious once, so much so that they used to erase all that is good in the world. The way you deal with difficulties in childhood has a huge impact on your ability to face challenges in adulthood.

Focus on Strengths

It is important for parents to focus on strengths of their child or children. Were you upset every time your child fell, when he or she was learning to walk or did you encourage the toddler to try again? Probably your answer and the final effect are rather obvious. Once your child learns to walk and moves on to increasingly difficult life challenges, you should not forget to provide them with similar support, because your encouragement is crucial for the formation of your child’s self-confidence and their ability to achieve subsequent goals.

Thanks to your support, your child will know that he or she is capable to manage in all kinds of situations and will not even consider a possibility of failure. He or she will persevere in face of potential difficulties and finally will achieve his or her goal. Just like Thomas Edison, who became one of the most renowned inventors in the world, despite many failures and despite his rebellion against the education system (he quit school, eventually).

Everyone has a talent. The processes of upbringing and education should focus on finding these talents and supporting children in their development. Do not concentrate solely on your children’s faults, because it will make them lose their self-confidence.

Support in Crisis Situations

Crisis situations often bring to mind events and words from the past, because they trigger flashbacks. The more positive affirmations you have heard and the more positive proof you have had that the affirmations are true, the easier it will be to recall them, when you need them the most.

The phrase “Belief can move mountains” may seem to be an empty slogan, but there is some truth to it. It is good to bear this saying in mind while supporting children in their endeavors.

If the most important people in my life, i.e. my parents, have always believed in me, then I have no reason to doubt myself.

 

258 maciej frasunkiewicz

About the Author

Maciej Frasunkiewicz – graduated from SWPS University with a degree in social psychology and subsequently completed professional training in positive psychology in education and child development. He currently works as a primary school psychologists. In his spare time he develops animated shorts and psychological workshops for teenagers and young adults.

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